the world from behind her camera
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My father’s flower.
Jul 23rd
20 days ago when I, for the last time, talked to my father, who could no longer open his mouth to talk nor open his eyes to see my mother and sisters who were by his bedside. 20 days ago I asked my mother to place the telephone to his ear so that he’ll be able to hear me. I knew he still could. It was 20 days ago when I uttered on the telephone, thousands of miles away, that I love him very very much and that he musn’t worry for someday we’ll (all) be reunited. 20 days ago I made him cry when he heard my voice, for the last time. 20 days ago, he tooks his last breath just before 3 o’ clock in the afternoon, shortly after my call.
It has been quiet around here because I went back to the Philippines to bid my father farewell. To see my mother and 3 sisters, to give support and get it as well from them, for this sometimes, unbearable pain. We 5 women, with the absence of my brother (in Saudi Arabia) who couldn’t get permission from work to come home, saw the man who was with us for 66 years turned into ashes like he requested.
How do you get over this? From losing your father? from losing the man who made you, you? Will the pain ever go away?
To find comfort, I have to constantly remind myself that my father who suffered pain for the past 13 years is now free from it,. Pain which he described to me in the past: “like I’m being jabbed with tiny nails all over my entire body every single day“. I couldn’t even imagine how painful that was. Now, no more jabbing of nails…..
Friends tell me my pain will heal someday.
To be honest, I don’t mind this pain that I feel. If it’s the only way to have my father’s memory stay with me for as long as I live, then bring it on.
**That was the tiny flower I took from my father’s funeral bouquet. This flower would remind me that on that day, July 9, he was turned into ashes, that we carried on his last earthly request.
Let dogs be dogs.
Jun 28th
click to enlarge
I found this photo from my 2008 files. This was shot at Bangkok’s Pratunam Market. I took this shot not because I thought the dog was cute but on the contrary, I was pissed off at its owner. Not only that the dog was dyed with colors but to add insult and DISCOMFORT to the poor thing, it had a shirt on. On a humid and high-temperature day! I don’t know if this was the dog owner’s way to attract people to buy from her or just plain naiveness.
I can understand people clothing their dogs during low temperature but in BKK where people would take their shirts off if they could, this was just wrong. I am no stranger in clothing dogs because my own pug has his jackets, which I seldom put on him and if ever I do, only for a few minutes of photo shooting, that’s it. But even when I do it only for few minutes, my husband would scold me bacause it’s not right to that to a dog, any dog. And he is absolutely right! Dog experts say that an exception is the chihuahua breed. I don’t know about that because I don’t have a chihuahua (yet.)
Anyway, imagine yourself covered with hair and living in a land where the average temperature is 29C? And with a shirt on?! Perhaps you’ll pant, hang your tongue out until it drops to the ground and BITE others around you because you’re irritated and feeling discomfort, wont you?
Let dogs , be dogs. Without shirts and not dyed, that’s the way they are created and should stay.
Note: background was changed into B&W and dog was selected to show only its colors.
party animals
Jun 27th
* click for a larger image *
Rockin’ Boys!
These two know where and how to party! Up from sunset til sunrise and yet still looking cute and sober.
How do they do that!?!
left: bear from hard rock cafe las vegas, gift from my husband.
right: bearista from starbucks las vegas, gift from an uncle.
photographer: woke up too early and had nothing better to do.
Summer is here at last!
Jun 22nd
I don’t know about you but my excitement begins when I see the likes of them around at the start of the year. Still close and ‘threatening’ to open anytime soon…
Because that means spring has sprung and about to be followed by summer, my favorite time of the year!
It’s here, it’s here! and like those birds chirping way too early in the morning and waaaay past their nesttime (bed time?) I am greeting summer with loads of fun plans! How about you? 
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